More Annoyed than Amused

Archive for the ‘Baby’ Category

Something I would Never Have Said at 2

Posted by parsingtime on March 19, 2013

Me: What are you drawing.
N: A website.

Of course.


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Best Part of My Day

Posted by parsingtime on February 19, 2013

Almost every morning since N was born (and even before that everyone morning of my married life at least) I turn on some sort of music. Rarely is it anything kid-ish. Just whatever I’m digging at the moment.  N gets her twinkles and old McDonald in the car.

Usually we eat breakfast together and then she goes off to play or draw while I’m washing dishes or something else equally mundane.  Invariably, at some point during that half hour a song will come on that gets her attention and she walks over, holds her arms up and asks me if I want to dance with her.

And then we dance, spin and giggle until the song is over and she goes back to whatever it is she was doing.





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24 Months

Posted by parsingtime on July 3, 2012

Dear N,

Happy 2nd birthday! You are now officially old enough to understand that birthdays mean presents and cake. Whenever I ask you what you want for your birthday you say, “banilla cake. And ice cream. And chocolate cake.” You definitely get the cake part of birthdays and as far as your concerned every meal should be a birthday cake meal.

I truly can’t believe that the little alien baby I birthed two years ago is now a walking, talking, singing girl. You speak in full sentences, can sing entire songs, know your alphabet and how to count, you know all your body parts (including ‘gina’ which makes your dad squirm every time you say it), lots of animals…you actually know too many things to list. Your favorite question is “what’s that mommy?”  And quite frankly I’m going to have to brush up because I don’t always know the exact names for things sometimes.

Are are a sweet and funny girl but not without your moments. Like last weekend when you had a complete and utter meltdown in Nordstrom because I would let you touch every pretty dress in the store.  You melted down so epically that you caused spontaneous sterilization in several women. Your Dad heard you and he was on a different floor from us.  The sweet, biddable child of a few months ago has figured out she has free will.  I’m guessing testing boundaries and limits will become the norm, so I’m steeling myself.

For the most part though I still really love hanging out with you day in and day out. You are capable of so much more these days and love participating in whatever activity I’m doing.   We have been doing a lot of cooking together and when Daddy comes home and you’ve helped make homemade pizza for dinner you can’t wait to tell him all about it and ask him if he likes it when we are eating.  Things like riding in the shopping cart with the car attachment can make your whole day.  You are still at an age where small things are so exciting and I hope that lasts for a while.

You also have started bringing your plate from the table to kitchen sink. An activity that makes me inordinately proud. You are (our whole family is) a very lucky girl and raising you so you aren’t spoiled is important to both your dad and I. You are polite (as polite as a 2 year old can be), mostly share well with your friends and are very empathetic. I hope your good manners and love of being helpful continue.

In other news I’m hoping that your second birthday is the worst birthday you ever have. You know, because at your birthday party on Saturday we ended up at urgent care where the very nice doctor popped your arm back into the socket because I dislocated it or something. We shockingly made it back for cake and everyone was nice enough to wait for you. But let’s just say your parents can’t handle another “exciting” birthday like that.

You are a great kid and somehow in the last two years some of the love songs that would automatically make me think of your dad now belong to you.  That is what you have done to my life.



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Posted by parsingtime on June 28, 2012

At the dry cleaners today the man parked next to us picked up his dry cleaning and then proceeded to get dressed for work right beside our car.

When I got back in the car with our shirts N said, ” Mommy that man take off the shirt. He NAAAAAKED. I watching naked man.”

I birthed a peeping Tomasina.

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Only my child…

Posted by parsingtime on June 8, 2012

Only my child would ask for sushi at 6:30 in the morning. It was her sick comfort food. Ha.

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Posted by parsingtime on June 5, 2012

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23 Months

Posted by parsingtime on June 4, 2012

Dear N,

Today you turn 23 months old. I can’t believe what a big girl you are. You speak in full sentences most of the time and your vocabulary sometimes blows me away. You still have a few funny word mix ups. Like the other day when you were trying to pull up your shorts but couldn’t (because you were standing on them), you looked at me and said, “mommy shorts too heavy.” Technically they did have 28lbs of toddler on them so I suppose you were right in a sense.

You are very into deciding your things on your own these days, so I always have to give you two options. When I ask do you want pancakes or cereal for breakfast you usually respond with something like bagels and a naughty smile. You like to eat by yourself and put on your own shoes and clothes and you always ask if you can drive the car when we go places. Nee-vah drive today? In a very hopeful voice.  Not today kid.

I recently realized that you pay attention when I’m on the phone and can now recite the last four digits of my cell phone just from hearing me tell it to other people. So this month we have been working on learning your address and your last name. You still don’t know your colors (I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong here) but when you flip through almost any book we have you can give a modified recitation of the story.  Owl Babies goes a little like this, “free (three) owls. Live in tree. Owls think. Sit tree. Mommy come back. The end.” 

You love singing, ABCs, Twinkle Twinkle, Boker Tov, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Happy Birthday, Baa Baa Black Sheep and some tick tock song over and over again. Happy Birthday is especially amusing. Because it is usually happy birthday mommy, then daddy, then outside, happy birthday typing. Everything in your world can be named in the happy birthday song.  Thus far it seems you don’t have any god given talent when it comes to carrying a tune.  And trust me it would be a talent given by some universal life force because I don’t have a great singing voice and your fathers is terrible.

You also sing We are Young by Fun. A LOT. You ask for it every time we are in the car as if I can magically make the radio play it.  I love hearing you sing “we are young. set the world fire. burn more sun.”

You love chasing birds, swimming, writing your name with a real pen, helping mix — in the garden or the kitchen, and playing pretend makeup.  You ask “what is that?” a million times a day and I really had to brush up on my construction vehicles in order to answer you correctly.

I keep saying it over and over in these letters but you are such a big girl now. I love your random acts of affection and sometimes get to glimpse your babyhood again when we are in new situations and you are nervous…but mostly you are a big girl who likes doing things “by self.”

Love you big girl,


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Month 22

Posted by parsingtime on May 3, 2012

Dear N,

This has been a banner month.  This is the month you stopped using diapers! You are officially a big girl now.

We potty trained you in three days at 21 months old. And I’m glad this letter is going to be around because when I become a full of really useful advice grandmother to your kids I’ll be able to say, “you were potty trained before you were two.”  Which, is what my mother had been telling me for the last few months but upon further questioning, after I potty trained you, was not the truth. Anyway…you are fully potty trained and while the first day made me question ever having more children or pets. The second day you only had one accident and you have only had one accident since then and that was during a nap when you were sick last week (yup, you don’t even wear a pull up for naps!).

And just so I remember for posterity, the first time you saw your own poop in the potty, you looked at me, and said, “mommy its snake.” The second time, “mommy, chocolate.”  Ha! Now when you poop you like to point out the odor.  Smelly, for a normal excretion, stinky for the next level up and pee-uuuuu stinky for nuclear level code red waste.

I’m officially diaper free and it feels good. It is also lovely to see how proud you are of yourself.  And I do so enjoy the “good job mommy” that I get every time I pee in the potty too. Everyday you are trying to be more and more independent. You want to put your shoes on yourself, and your clothes. You want to wash your hands “by self” and read your own books. And lets not even even get started on how offended you are if I try to join in on your rendition of twinkle twinkle little star, the itsy bitsy spider or the wheels on the bus. You can sing them yourself thank you very much.

You are talking a mile a minute these days. Saying words and phrases that I don’t even remember saying to you.  You are becoming braver by the day but remember your hurts well.  You won’t go down the slide any more without touching it to see if it is hot. After some hot legs down the slide a few weeks ago, you are cautious. But you recently pet a goat and a dog. This was huge since most animals scare you and have since you were very little.

We have entered the no phase of your life. Most questions are answered with a no unless I ask if you want cake/cookies/ice cream or if I ask you what time it is (it’s thirty mommy) or if I ask where you want to go (park swing).  We have also entered the hit mommy when I’m frustrated phase. Neither of these are pleasing to me. But the hitting is unacceptable. You know you aren’t supposed to do it because as soon as you hit and I start walking you to the time out corner, you say, “sorry mommy. No hitting.”  Unfortunately kid, even though I appreciate the sentiment you still have to stand in timeout.

I had my first official parent teacher conference this week for you. Which on the one hand is a hilarious because you are 22 months old and on the other hand was interesting to me because the things I’m emphasizing at home, cleaning up after ourselves and being polite (you know when and how to say, please, thank you, excuse me and your welcome) were noted by your teachers.  Despite the ongoing drop off drama I think that your little two day a week program is good for you and I’m happy with the decision your Dad and I made to put you in even though at the time it felt a little like I was abandoning you.

You are obsessed with Elmo, Daddy, swings, washing your hands and mixing (cooking with mommy). You aren’t a huge fan of milk, things that are hot or getting dirty. You have started to pretend play (mommy, I sleeping. Followed by closed eyes and laying down. 3.4 seconds later: Mommy I wake up) and like putting diapers on Elmo because has stinky poopy.

You say I love you unprompted and your dad and I felt special…until you told the grocery check out lady and the guy in line for coffee with the handle bar mustache that you loved them.

Happy 22 months big girl.


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Month 21

Posted by parsingtime on April 8, 2012

Dear N,

This letter is a few days late and is going to be short and sweet.  This month has been the month of “play puzzles.”  If we aren’t swinging at the park then you want to play puzzles.  You like your puzzles until you have mastered them and then you move on to the next one.  You recently mastered your fish colors puzzle (proving to me that you aren’t color blind, which doesn’t make me feel any better because every color is blue or red) and though you like to see if I will clap if you put the purple fish tail in the red fish (I don’t. We don’t reward failure in this house (your dad wrote that line, but he has a point)) you actually do know where everything is supposed to go.  We have now moved on to the ABC puzzle and 123 puzzle.

You can sing your ABCs and can as of this week count to 10 though for some reason 4 is a hard number for you.You love “big bus” (metro buses) and seeing  “frucks” (trucks) and enjoy bumpy roads.

School drop offs have not gotten any better and Random even got to experience them with me.  She can attest to the huge tears and clinging arms.  We had company all week in the form of Random Banker.  She, as you discovered is excellent at puzzles and spotting big buses. She also knows how to push swings in super fun ways that mommy did not know about.

You are talking in sentences now, which blows me away.  I love the communication most of the time though you do love to test limits and see what you can get away with.  Like, pausing to look at me when I’ve told you not to run into the street, smiling devilishly and the running into the street.

My least favorite thing that you do right now is cling to my legs, saying mommy over and over.  Usually while I’m trying to make dinner or do something that doesn’t involve playing puzzles.  My favorite thing that you do right now is coming over unprompted to give me a hug or a kiss.  It is unbelievably sweet and I figure I should get as many in while I can since one day you will want me to walk 5 steps behind you so it doesn’t look like we are together.

Happy 21 Months.

Love, Mommy

PS – the waking up between 5 and 5:45am must stop. Remember I’m keeping track and plan on waking you up on weekends at 5am during your high school years.

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Posted by parsingtime on March 22, 2012

I’m going to miss this kid.


Turn down the music, Daddy. She does not get long skinny legs from me.

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