More Annoyed than Amused

Archive for March, 2012


Posted by parsingtime on March 22, 2012

I’m going to miss this kid.


Turn down the music, Daddy. She does not get long skinny legs from me.


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She Loves Kimbra

Posted by parsingtime on March 20, 2012

I find N’s taste in music so interesting.  Sometimes when I’m playing my music around the house (and lets be honest we listen to a lot more of her music than mine – my poor ears will never recover from the majority of her music) N will sometimes stop what she is doing to come over to the speakers and start dancing.

Currently she digs this. But only when Kimbra starts singing.  Lest you think I totally influence her taste in music…when we are at my boot camp class and Rhianna’s We Found Love starts playing she says, “no, no, no sing.”  She really doesn’t like it.  She doesn’t like it when I sing twinkle twinkle little star either, but that is a whole other story.  I wonder what it is in her mind that makes one song acceptable verses another.

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Good Day

Posted by parsingtime on March 16, 2012

Today is the best day I’ve had in several weeks (no vomit, diarrhea, root canals, cranky toddlers). Just a good day filled with a special post birthday coffee for Mommy (many miles out of my way for my favorite hot drink), two hours at the park for N, followed by her favorite broccoli pizza, and coloring and playing while Mommy tidied the house.

Now she is napping and I’m catching up on some very important news in the form of US Weekly (personal note to Jessica Simpson, lay off the buttered pop tarts girlfriend).

Bottle of champagne in the fridge, art class this afternoon and Husband is home tonight.

Happy to feel like my old self (amazing what a full night of sleep will do for both you and your child).

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Toddler Fashion Police

Posted by parsingtime on March 14, 2012

Am I the only person who thinks halter tops, tube tops, one shoulder rompers and spaghetti straps are inappropriate for the 2t to 10 year old set stores are trying to sell to?

My kid is going to hate me when she is 10 because all her friends are going to look cute and 15 and she will still look ten.

I can’t even use turning another year older this month as an excuse, because I’ve always been a 900 years old. My age is just catching up with my outlook.

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Cheese Monkey

Posted by parsingtime on March 13, 2012

Husband and his parents decided they wanted to take N to Chuck E Cheese this past weekend. I did not agree with this for several reasons, one she is too young (deemed a party pooper for that one), two, she hates crowds (it was a rainy Sunday), three, she gets scared in loud places (ball parks, large parties etc).

I was overruled.

She did relatively well there but there were very few games for her to play, and she was too little for the tubes and slides by herself.  The loud noises and large crowd were a little overwhelming.  But none of that compares to Husband showing her the animatronic Chuck E Cheese band on stage.  That scared the shiznit out of her.

She was so scared that that night she woke up several times before I finally brought her to our bad crying and clinging to my head saying, “scare cheese monkey, mommy. Scare cheese monkey.”  Cheese Monkey = Chuck E Cheese, who is technically a mouse but looked like a scary non-flying Wizard of Oz Monkey.  She spent the rest of the night attached to my head.

Husband then went out of town. And daylight savings occurred so now I have a kid who is telling me, “no dark mommy, no nigh nigh” and “mommy lie down, scare cheese monkey.”  Translation – it isn’t dark you crazy woman why do I have to go to bed and lie down next to my crib and hold my hand because I’m scared.

Party pooper or not I get to decide the activity next time.

PS – I have recovered from my hell week though I did step in a pile of ants on Monday. And I burned my hand tonight on a pan so I’m not sure it is completely over yet.

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Posted by parsingtime on March 9, 2012

My week continued to go downhill.  I caught N’s virus which manifested itself at 11:30 last night in buckets of diarrhea and vomit. Was that too graphic? Sorry. It was more graphic for Husband who walked into the bathroom at 1:30 in the morning when he heard the retching and groaning.  We will both attest to the fact that spicy jambalaya is not good in reverse.

You would think that feeling and looking like what was coming out of my body would mean canceling my root canal. But no, I manned up, took some Imodium and hoped for the best. I managed to get through the dentist without incident and came home and slept. But it was touch and go for a while on whether I was going to be that woman who vomited on her dentist.

And then — oh you thought that was the end of the story? It isn’t. IT GOT WORSE. — I grabbed N’s hand to walk her to the bath and she started crying.  Her arm went limp.  Husband walked in and realized something was really wrong and we went to urgent care. Her radial bone slipped out of the tendon and the doctor had to maneuver it back in.

We also had to hold her down for x-rays while she pitifully hic-cried, “home, home, arm hurt, home” over and over.

The amazing thing was once the doctor fixed her arm she was back to her usual happy self and started talking about all the rain, and thunder and how the “doc-ker fixed arm.”

I’m hoping this is all this week is going to throw at me because seriously, I’m raising the white flag.

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This week is not going to get better

Posted by parsingtime on March 7, 2012

All weekend I dealt with a tooth ache that made me understand why people with chronic pain would consider suicide.

So Tuesday I went to the dentist so he could fix it. It didn’t work.

I went to my favorite coffee shop to console myself with a orange mocha latte.  I needed the sugar and caffeine because  I couldn’t sleep due to the searing pain in my head.  The espresso machine was broken. I ordered a muffin. It was dry so I returned it. Turned out it was yesterdays muffin.

N decided today would be a good day to get a virus and spent the day alternating between puke and diarrhea. Diarrhea that caused her to tell me, “poopy smell bad mommy.”  Understatement of 2012.

I spent her nap time working instead of showering because vomit covered mommy had a deadline.

Friday I get a root canal.

And this weekend my in-laws visit.

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Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes

Posted by parsingtime on March 3, 2012

These were a winner with the kiddo and her parents (one of whom abhors bananas).

Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes (I used this recipe, minus the nutmeg, plus the egg and mixed it together differently — though that certainly does not make it my recipe — it is good though. Also she has photos.).

makes 12 pancakes

  • 2 cups whole wheat pastry flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 cup brown sugar
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 2/3 cup milk
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 3 large ripe bananas, mashed
  • 2 tablespoons butter, melted
  • 1 egg

In a large bowl, combine flour, baking powder, sugar, salt and cinnamon in a large bowl. Mash banana, add in the milk, vanilla extract and egg to it. Whisk together the dry ingredients and add wet ingredients stirring to combine.  Add in melted butter and stir until batter is somewhat smooth.

Cook like pancakes (in a pan or griddle until you see bubbles and flip).

I might or might not have eaten mine with a thin layer of almond butter. My own little version of the Elvis sandwich. N ate hers with a dab of honey.

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Month 20

Posted by parsingtime on March 3, 2012

Dear N,

In a few every short months I won’t be counting your age in months. You will officially be a big girl.  Except that you already are.  You are constantly saying “self” when you want to do something by yourself.  I realized this past month that you were a big girl when you climbed up the jungle gym by yourself and slid down without my assistance to get you on the slide.  I’m going to pretend you are still my baby for four more months even though we both know it isn’t true, okay?

A few things: one bragging and one just pathetic about your mother.

It is frankly shocking that I’m allowed to be a mother of a girl with copious amounts of hair given my inability to do anything with my own other than wear it down or in a ponytail. Nani french braided your hair and you looked uber-cute.  But what I lack in hair doing abilities I make up for in healthy delicious snacks.  Your teacher told me I bring the best tasting snacks to school.  It made me feel like I’m winning at the stay at home mom gig. Homemade granola bars? Your mom rocks those. Cute hair, not so much.

Last week when I put you in the car and asked you what you did at school and you said, “sing. E-I-E-O.”   Today your dropped a bowl of strawberries and said, “I drop it.” I know everyone’s kid does this but I’m still amazed at the rate you pick up words and really understand the meaning.  You know that fans spin but you also know that other things that turn around (like the office chair) also spin. The sentences though? They are blowing me away.  You are a real human being, who understands what I’m saying.  Of course that doesn’t always work in my favor.  Like when it is raining and I say we can’t go to the park, well you understand and you don’t like it.

We are now through month two of school and I think it is helping.  You still cry at drop off but when you talk about school when you aren’t there it is always in a happy way. You like to name all your friends and tell me about Ms. Lacy and how you “did art” and played “ouuuu-side.”  We went to visit Kelly Belly and her boys a couple of weeks ago and you played in the play room with R&N without clinging to my legs.  You even visited and played with Gigi. It was nice to see you friendly and happy — the way I see you so much of the time but others don’t because you are so nervous around new people and crowds.

We have a busy month ahead of us at the end of which mommy and daddy are heading on vacation for a few days.  The Caribbean is calling our name and in the future I imagine a lot of our vacations will be to family friendly beach resorts and Disney World but for now you are going to spend a few fun-filled days with your grandparents and we are going sit on a beach and sleep til 8am (a full two hours than we sleep now), like the crazy kids that we are used to be.

We spent our honeymoon in Aruba and almost seven years later we are headed back.  So much has changed and while we will relish our child free days on the beach I know we will be anxious to get back to you.  You are the funniest, most fun and interesting person in our life right now.

Love Mommy

PS – you know the difference between a truck, dump truck, and tractor but every color is red. Are you color blind? It’s starting to worry me.

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