Parsingtime

More Annoyed than Amused

Archive for April, 2011

Birthday Weekend Fail

Posted by parsingtime on April 30, 2011

Husband’s birthday weekend was a bust.  Dinner was okay even though I spent my entire week struggling over the best place.  We left before dessert because it was kind of that much of a bust.  We came home and walked over to a local place to order drinks and dessert.  Husband ordered me the wrong dessert and that just made the night an epic fail (can you imagine getting coconut cream pie when you wanted the nutella mousse with brownie?).

I’m funny like that. I don’t sweat the big stuff (Husband doesn’t have a job and I’m pregnant? Sure, whatever. We are moving to Dubai. Okay, fine) but the small stuff can ruin my entire day.

Then today we had plans to go out and had a sitter coming over. She was supposed to arrive at 6:15.  At 6:26 I called to make sure she wasn’t lost etc.  At 6:50 Husband left to go out without me.  At 7:41 I got a text that read (verbatim): Im so srryy i forgot. i normally remember. Im at another babysittin job right now.  Im really sorry. Oh my gosh i feel terrible.    This is a Rice University student.

If my child ever writes in text talk I’m going to take away her phone. I don’t think it is too much to ask for to have a decently written text. (Yes, Yes, I know the grammatical mistakes on this blog are atrocious but they aren’t intentional but usually due to lack of time).

So here I am alone on a Saturday night, eating leftovers out of my fridge, writing this blog and researching mothers day out programs.  If I weren’t so darn fortunate to have a lovely life in general (you know the one that can afford babysitters and dinners out) I might feel like banging my head up against a wall.  But since I clearly suffer from first world upper middle class problems I’m going to shut it and get back to my research.

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Ready for Next Week

Posted by parsingtime on April 28, 2011

This week:

  • The baby has refused to nap making her a hot mess of Lindsey Lohan proportions (if LL was almost 10 months old)
  • I haven’t washed my hair in four days (I think) because someone wakes up and screams before I have a chance.  Worse yet, my hair has been through two days of outdoor bootcamp. It isn’t pretty.
  • I forgot to put a key ingredient in the muffins I made to take to someone’s home tomorrow and they taste awful. I don’t have enough stuff to make more muffins.
  • Husband’s birthday gift has no hope of getting here in time for his actual birthday.
  • I can’t decide on where to take him for his birthday. He has literally been everywhere good in Houston.
  • I have more things for this list but the baby is up again from her nap after less than an hour. Of course.

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Oral Fixation

Posted by parsingtime on April 25, 2011

We took away the kids pacifier five or six weeks ago and she has replaced it by adjusting her sleep sack just so, so that she can sleep with her tongue licking the fabric while she sleeps.  If you move it she adjusts it back into position. I hope this doesn’t mean she is going to be a smoker or constant gum chewer or something.

She is also almost ten months old and has not figured out how to sit up on her own or crawl. How concerned should I be?

This parenting gig is constantly making me feel guilty. I feel like I’m failing to do enough of the right stuff with her. If I had surely she would be crawling or able to stack the rings on the ring stacker.

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PSA: Family Trip

Posted by parsingtime on April 24, 2011

We are back from Jamaica where we celebrated my Dad’s 60th birthday in luxurious style.  We rented a 6 bedroom house with it’s own beach, pool and staff of 7.  We ate extremely well, kayaked, snorkeled, swam with dolphins, danced with a 3 piece reggae band and played a lot of poor tennis.  It was lovely.

I would like however to inform the childless out there that vacationing with your kids cannot be considered a “vacation” in the sense of the word.  You are not escaping your day to day life (especially if you are at home like me) and sitting on a beach sipping rum punches and doing nothing. No, in fact you have moved your child to a new location without the majority of their stuff and just expect them to love swimming and sand etc.

The  first two days were not so fun for me because I hadn’t realized that I was on a family trip and not on a vacation.  Once I got over that hump things were good.  Also, vacationing with capable grandparents who don’t mind taking your kiddo into their room and waking up with her at 6am is key.

Anyway, an excellent way to celebrate 60.

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Egg Free

Posted by parsingtime on April 24, 2011

It is Easter Sunday and I have not eaten one bag of Cadbury Mini Eggs in 2011.  This is both shocking and a record.

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Coffee Table and Staircase Frames

Posted by parsingtime on April 4, 2011

For the first time in almost six years of marriage we have a coffee table. We no longer have to use the table that goes with our patio furniture in our living room. This is big people.

Also big?

This wall of photos. This has been my biggest home project to date. I thrifted frames (me thrifting) and didn’t pay more than $4 for any of the frames. I bought ugly gold frames and frames with sketches of clowns in them and spray painted everything black. Then I bought white mattes and printed out some of my favorite photos of family and friends. Though you can’t see it, many of you blog readers have made it on to the wall.  It isn’t quite finished but I’m definitely making progress on making our house a little homier (is this not a word?)

I know for most people this wouldn’t be a big project but I’m neither creative nor crafty so buying spray paint and seeing potential in clown paintings is a big deal for me.

Next I need to tackle our bedroom which currently doesn’t have a head-board or anything on the walls.

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Nine Months: Brain Synapse

Posted by parsingtime on April 3, 2011

Dear N,

Nine Months old today! Wow, you’ve spent almost as much time out of my body as in and quite frankly I prefer you out. This month has been big…you are now mobile. Sort of. You can only move backwards but still that is progress from last month when you would just roll over on to your back and not even try.  You can also get from sitting to crawling and do a mean push up.

I have the feeling that next month this letter will go something like, N you are crawling, have tipped over the trash and are generally crawling amok. I say that because I bought you a  walker (randomly from another mom just to try) and now that you’ve realized how to use the thing you like to cruise along and pull down/tip over anything within reach. The dish towels are a particular favorite. You then lean over the walker to inspect your handiwork and then look over to me and smile. Like, yes, I did that. It was awesome. And I am super cool. I only wish I as much joy regarding washing the dishes as you do throwing tea towels on the floor.

The other momentous occurrence this month is you have learned to pick your nose. Mommy and Daddy are so proud. I’m not actually sure that you are consciously picking your nose since you stick your fingers in your ears, mouth, belly button and any other open holes you find (like my ears and nose and also that book of farm animal masks) but still nose picking is a rite of passage since everyone in the history of mankind has done it at one point or another.

Just so you know, most people find small animals very cute. They are furry, cuddly and tend to pee on you at inopportune times (this actually describes the first two months of your life) you however, are not most people and cower in fear over two-day old baby goats. It was actually amusing to see you try crawl up on top of your father’s head at the petting zoo.  I knew you were flexible but I’ve never seen you actually contract your body so that your feet looked like they were connected to your neck.  Bambi was not going to eat you and that goat that chewed on your father’s shoe laces six feet below you did not warrant the tears of horror.  It did however make for some good photos.

Your “talking” has exploded this month and we regularly hear mamama as well as dada and lots of other consonants in front of the ah sound. You don’t like it when I video you or take photos since you want to be the one in charge of holding any expensive electronics within your reach.  You do however love watching videos of yourself. You’re quite the narcissist.  You als0 learned how to throw a ball this month and I was convinced that you were going to be right handed since that is the arm you always use for ball throwing (by the way when I ask you to throw the ball to me, you inevitably throw it anywhere but to me. We need to work on aim). But then I started giving you more finger foods and you always use your left hand to pick up food.  So once again whether you will be an awesome unique lefty or righty like the rest of the world has yet to be decided.

Your current favorite books is Where is the Green Sheep? Aunt Random bought it for you and what is amazing for me is you really seem to understand that we are looking for something. Every time we read the book you look at the pages so solemnly. Like, yes here is the band sheep and here the moon sheep but where, where is the green sheep? When we get to the last page you smile so big and stab your stubby little finger over the green sheep. There he is! You do this even when I don’t add any excited inflection in my voice and it makes me wonder if you really understand what is happening.

Needless to say, seeing the world through your eyes has been eye opening for me. Your fear of baby goats, your excitement over green sheep, the fact that you looked at me and smiled when you heard Rolling in the Deep come on in this store yesterday make me realize how far you’ve come in the last nine months. Your brain is making connections. It really is awesome. And you are super cool.

Love,

Mama

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