Parsingtime

More Annoyed than Amused

Roxy

Posted by parsingtime on April 15, 2010

So today while at the grocery store a scraggly looking man with an even scraggly-er looking goatee behind me in line asked if I was pregnant.

Yes.

Are you taking care of yourself?

Uh, yes.

I notice you are buying deli meat. You know pregnant women shouldn’t eat deli meat.

That’s for my husband.

Oh, well, that’s okay then. What are you having?

A girl.

Have you picked out a name?

No we haven’t.

Well you should buy a book. That’s what everyone does.

I’ll have to look into that. Thanks.

You know I have a friend who is a child psychiatrist and he says the first five years are the most important in having your kid be normal and not a psychopath.

I mean I don’t have kids but my friend is a child psychiatrist so he would know.  I like the name Roxanne by the way. You could call her Roxy.

That’s a nice name. Thanks for the suggestion.

And then it turned out that the cashier was also pregnant so even though I thought I could escape the conversation it continued with a third person.

I don’t like to talk to people sitting next to me on the plane and I certainly don’t want to talk to people at the grocery store beyond the hi how are you, have a nice day stuff.

And, in case you were wondering you should never go to the post office on April 15. You will live to regret it.

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One Response to “Roxy”

  1. Hannah said

    It only gets worse when the baby comes. You have to make small talk with every old lady you come across. Most of them are fine but every once in a while you get a creepy one. Is it nice of me to point out the things that will only suck harder when you actually have the kid? You’re welcome!

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