Parsingtime

More Annoyed than Amused

Archive for March, 2009

Dude, Where’s My Car?

Posted by parsingtime on March 31, 2009

I finished grocery shopping today (let’s not ask how many grapefruits I bought because the number is shocking) and I was walking back to my car and as I approached it I thought to myself, wow, the dent doesn’t look so bad from this angle,  and then proceeded to try and open the door so that I could throw in my groceries.  For some reason my key wouldn’t work.  And that’s when I noticed a little old lady holding a lipstick tube in midair looking at me like I was trying to car jack her.  

It wasn’t my car. Whoops.

The Charlotte police have now put out an APB on a late twenties Indian woman (with a fantastic new hair cut) who uses Whole Foods reusable bags and likes to accost old ladies in silver Nissans.

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Grapefruit

Posted by parsingtime on March 29, 2009

I am currently unnaturally obsessed with fresh squeezed grapefruit with a squirt of Agave syrup and some ice.  If you don’t have agave on hand some simple syrup works well too.

No seriously, me, the person who won’t eat an actual grapefruit ever because they are sour and taste like an orange gone wrong.

The juice however without all that fibrous stuff is excellent and very refreshing.  It’s good, I promise. I wouldn’t lead you astray.

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Parental Guidance

Posted by parsingtime on March 28, 2009

First off, Husband and I went and saw Watchmen today.  A movie that I thought was OK but Husband liked. It was a really awkward movie watching experience however, because there was a 6 or 7 year old boy there with his parents.  There is a pretty intense sex scene in the movie and an almost rape as well as a ton of violence. I wouldn’t have taken at 12 year old to this movie.  Both Husband and I were disturbed that these parents would take there kid to a movie like this. I mean I know a babysitter is expensive and everything but seriously, just wait for the movie to come out on DVD. Also the movie was almost three hours long. No 6-7 year old has patience for a movie that long.

Second this was the conversation we had after receiving a birth announcement from the Maridull Bliss team.

How come people always put the length of the baby? Why do people care about the babies height.

I don’t know, it is just standard. Name, height, weight…those are the things people want to know.

I bet we have small babies.

Why?

Because we are Indian. Indian people have small babies. I weighed 6lbs. How much did you weigh?

I don’t know, I think 5lbs or something.  I hope we have a big baby though.

Why?

So I have less weight to lose.

I can’t believe you said that.  You’re crazy. You should post this to Parsingtime.

And lastly, the CIA Twins are engaged! Husband and I are beyond thrilled that two people we love are getting married! And even better they will be back from Sydney in a few months. Woo!

Posted in Conversations | 1 Comment »

Pantyliners

Posted by parsingtime on March 24, 2009

What is this?

Uh, pantyliners.

They are Target brand. Why did you buy Target brand?

Because they are the same as the regular brand, just cheaper.

I’ve never seen you ever buy off brand, uh, stuff

I don’t think it really matters. Pantyliners are pretty standard. If it makes you feel better I bought Tampax brand tampons.

You bought off brand. <shaking head in horror> I can’t believe it.  The recession has finally hit our household.

I think you are overreacting.

Posted in Conversations | 4 Comments »

M&Ms, Politicians, Eez

Posted by parsingtime on March 21, 2009

Does anyone else find it disturbing that in M&M commercials the big talking M&M’s with hands and feet eat the little M&Ms? It’s chocolate cannibalism.

Also, passing a bill that imposes a 90% tax on people who got bonuses from companies that accepted TARP money strikes me as scary.  I’m not saying those people deserve the bonuses (especially not the dudes at AIG or Freddie and Fannie) but making punitive laws tailored to a very specific people is a wrong.  I don’t like the idea of the government being able to pass a bill on whatever they don’t like specifically related to one person or a narrow group of people. It’s like the Terry Schaivo case.  I can’t really explain it, it just feels wrong to me.

Also, the more I see these politicians on TV the more I realize they are really not that competent to their job. They don’t have the time or inclination to read bills, they are constantly trying to get re-elected and there are too many issues for them to be fully informed or even understand them all.  I’ve met a few of the Representatives from Texas and a couple of them have definitely earned a “you are stupid” seal of horror from me.  Of course, I tend to be judgmental.

And lastly, Husband and I went to Eez in Huntersville last night and had a great meal. It is owned a Texas alum and we had been meaning to try it for ages. It was really fantastic and worth the drive out.  We had some really unique sushi and great service.  It is in a nice little shopping complex that reminded me of Uptown in Dallas (where Magnolia and Taco Diner etc are and there are apartments above the shops) and it is a great place to eat and then grab some gelato or window shop or go to a movie.

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Bad Week

Posted by parsingtime on March 20, 2009

So this first week of 29 has been so crappy that I need a do over.

This week I might or might not have unknowingly made appointment for my car to meet a lamp post.  It was a bad meeting.  No one left happy. Well the lamp post was probably happy.  I mean it got to serve two functions this week and who isn’t happy multi-tasking?

I also might or might not have cried on the phone when calling Husband to tell him about my very important meeting. One of those silent cries…you know the one. It’s the one where even if you tried to talk no one would understand what you were saying because nothing intelligible could possibly come out of your mouth.  That one. Which of course worried Husband and forced him home from work early to make sure I didn’t do something really crazy like wash all the whites with one red sock.  

I am embarrassed for having such a girl reaction to something that wasn’t such a big deal — and let’s be honest I can only say that now because it is Friday and this happened Tuesday. On Tuesday, the incident was the proverbial straw that broke me.  Plus, I would never purposely wash all the whites with a red sock.

Also, I might or might not have had a minor breakdown over my work (this did not involve crying, just a lot of sitting behind my computer looking for jobs (that I don’t really want,  in the worst economy since 1930), thinking about law school and wondering what happened to my career.  I discovered overall I like what I do and despite that there are reasons to keep doing it just for the options I get over the next few years when we have kids. So I came out of that funk with a renewed sense of purpose and a marketing plan.   And given that I’m not in a field remotely related to marketing this was an accomplishment.

There have been good things this week…I made three new things for dinner and they all turned out really well, I got an excellent box of clementines in March,  my grandmother called and didn’t have any new aches and pains to tell me about, I only ate 6 Cadbury mini eggs the whole week (that’s not even a full serving size!),  I started a new exercise program that is kicking my ass (which is something only I would enjoy, I know), UT won their basketball game and the sun is finally shining again after a week of overcast nastiness.

Small things,  but I’ll take them.

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Smoking is Bad

Posted by parsingtime on March 18, 2009

I hate this commercial.  It plays all the time here.

Posted in MOG | 1 Comment »

Happy 242nd Birthday Andrew

Posted by parsingtime on March 15, 2009

Let’s be honest, when the weather drops 40 degrees in the night and our apartment is freezing all my “don’t touch me” crazed nighttime rules go out the window, and I turn into a parasite whose legs somehow find themselves between Husbands.

Fortunately, Husband isn’t the sort to throw the rules up in your face.  He is however the type to call you a Cougar for the 45 days that you are older than him.

The silver lining in all this ides of March business is that I did get carded last night while we were out for dinner.  Here’s hoping to another ten years of carding!

Posted in Me | 2 Comments »

I Hate Wind Chimes

Posted by parsingtime on March 9, 2009

Dear Apartment Complex Owner People,

I think you need to change the apartment rules. If you own a pet, you must pick up after it. Most people find dodging dog crap while carrying multiple bags of groceries annoying. Especially when the dog went on the path and not on the grass.

Rule two: People should not be allowed to have wind chimes. Oh I realize they are allowed to anything within reason to their balconies but if they are allowed to have wind chimes that disturb my sleep every freaking night? Then I’m allowed to take cymbals and play them on my balcony for two hours every evening from 11pm to 1am. It’s only fair.

I’m an excellent Cymbal player by the way.

Sincerely,

Parsing

Posted in MOG | 5 Comments »

Almost Perfect Weekend

Posted by parsingtime on March 8, 2009

Husband and I had a great weekend which included:  The Noda Art Walk, dinner with our favorite Charlotte friends, pineapple mango mojitos, mani/pedi (for me), new chairs for our balcony, 70 degree weather, Arnold Palmers while lounging in our new patio chairs in 70 degree weather, successful recreation of a Wolfgang Puck salad, two excellent walks on a nearby hiking trail, sushi, a movie, 16 hours of sleep and chocolate cake.

If it hadn’t been day light savings weekend it would have been the perfect relaxing weekend. I dislike daylight savings intensely.  But overall a great way to relax after angsting over Lucius all week.

Posted in Navel Gazing | 2 Comments »