Parsingtime

More Annoyed than Amused

Archive for May, 2008

Will Never Weigh 99lbs Again

Posted by parsingtime on May 25, 2008

After one year of working out and not losing any weight I finally bit the bullet and put all my extra small shirts and size 0 pants in a bag for goodwill. I will probably never make it back down to my college weight again, unless I become an anorexic or Husband springs for some lipo…and even then it’s doubtful. Why does no one warn you that one day out of the blue you will get hips?

I’m depressed.

Posted in Navel Gazing | 3 Comments »

A Few Thoughts from Troy

Posted by parsingtime on May 25, 2008

So we were in Myrtle Beach for the last few days and in between took a quick trip to find an apartment. We found a lovely apartment that will be more than half the price of our one in Boston and twice as much space. I’m thrilled.

Anyway, we were in Myrtle Beach during Black Biker Week which made our stay there that much more interesting. We were in a beach house and our next door neighbor was Troy who was in town for BBW. Troy would come over and comment on my ability to play corn hole (throwing bean bags into a hole) and the men’s ability to BBQ.

On several of his visits we learned these pearls of wisdom.

Just because women carry/grow the kid doesn’t mean they have an emotional attachment to it.  They are like backpacks, they just hold the stuff.

You don’t have to be faithful to girlfriends. They are like rental cars, switch ’em out as often as you want but don’t ever think you are the only man to ride it.

Good to know, Troy. Good to know.

Posted in Travel | 1 Comment »

Toilet

Posted by parsingtime on May 20, 2008

So this morning Husband and I had a 6:50 flight out to Myrtle Beach. We got up at about 5 and weirdly the bathroom was in use…my sister graduated from med school this weekend and we had family friends over for the weekend. I thought maybe someone had accidentally left the light on so I knocked softly and opened the door.

On the other side of that door: a family friend, with his pants around his ankles, a magazine in his hand and fast asleep.

So I quietly closed the door and asked Husband what we should do. I mean our toothbrushes etc were in the bathroom and I didn’t want to go in there after some guy had been in there for god knows how long. So we stomped around and made a lot of noise and 15 minutes later the bathroom was free.

It wasn’t a pleasant way to start the day.

Posted in MOG | Leave a Comment »

Momentous Occasion

Posted by parsingtime on May 4, 2008

I’m traveling for work starting today so I’m going to miss a big day in the Household of Time. Tomorrow Husband takes his final exam and will officially be done with his MBA.

So here we are two years and two hundred thousand dollars later ($200,000 — it’s a lot of zeros and it makes my heart skip a beat in not good ways) and quite frankly I think we will look back at the last two years and be amazed we got to meet the people we met, go the places we went and do the things we did.

It has been a really great two years, despite the minuscule apartment and crappy Boston weather (hello it is May and in the 40s).  Husband and I have made great friends that I think will last a lifetime and done a bunch of things that we may not have the opportunity or time to do until Husband becomes a gazillionaire or we retire…whichever comes first.

So congrats to Husband for finishing. Another six weeks in Boston and we are moving onward and upward to Carolina and the next phase of our lives.

Posted in Husband, School | 2 Comments »

Kids: Cure for Boredom

Posted by parsingtime on May 1, 2008

If we had a kid I wouldn’t be so bored right now. I could play peek-a-boo and make silly faces which you don’t appreciate.

What about all the other stuff? Do you really want to wipe shi*t off someone else’s ass?

Well I do my own and isn’t awful. Not pleasant but not awful.

Yeah, but that shi*t has been smushed up in a diaper and its not neatly contained. You have to really clean. Kids get explosive diarrhea and you have to clean it up.

Eww gross.

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Posted in Conversations | 4 Comments »